I’ve been on Facebook since 2013, practically still a rookie. Every few days when I check Facebook first thing, something in my ‘memories’ that pops up. Which means at one time from 1 to 7 years ago I posted that before it became a memory. Boring food stuff usually, something I’ve canned, baked or a goofy craft project I did with my grandson Graham, who was very young.

I posted fairly often, mostly on “if you grew up in Rock Valley” or shared my blog posts which I had recently started writing. But never memes from other sites. I read what others posted and usually laughed. Who are these crazy people who think that stuff up? I’m in awe of their cleverness and creativity, but seldom tempted to post and share the memes on my own newsfeed.

But as the years ticked by so did some of my infatuation with Facebook. Not gonna lie, the campaign before the 2016 election almost did me in. Naive Iowa gal foolishly thought once the election was over, no matter what the outcome, Facebook would right itself and become fun again. Au contraire. Worse than ever. So I checked it less often, commented less, posted less. If not for my grandson Landon’s (Drew to the rest of the world) prolific high school basketball career, food or my blog, there just wasn’t much I wanted to share with others.

I still looked at what others posted. Laughed when it was funny, nodded when I agreed and shook my head at some of the spiteful posts on my newsfeed. Realized that’s how folks felt, one way or the other and arguing wasn’t going to change their mind or mine. But they still were my friends, most of them from when I was a kid growing up in Rock Valley.

Rock Valley was a small, predominantly Dutch town. My parents were Dutch. Mom was raised by her Dutch immigrated paternal grandparents, who continued to wear wooden shoes their whole lives. One would think I would have grown up speaking Dutch fluently, yet I did not. Mom and Dad both spoke Dutch with ease, yet it was rarely spoken in daily conversations. When they preferred their youngest, nosey child not understand what (or more likely who) they were talking about, they spoke Dutch exclusively. I asked Mom to teach me Dutch and she did to some extent one summer, but I sure regret not learning a lot more of their Dutch language, history and customs.

They did use a fair share of Dutch slang on a regular basis. Many of these terms, phrases and quirky words have stuck with me throughout my life and I still use them on a daily basis. If I were in the Netherlands I doubt many natives would recognize any of my oft used slang words. They have probably been so Americanized they’re no longer close to what was originally taught to Mom and Dad almost a century ago.

I posted a blog story on my family’s use of Dutch slang 6 years ago called, Hut-fa-Duttie. (Are you kidding me? Six years! I thought I’d be done writing after 3 months). I know what you’re thinking-she is done writing but she can’t help herself and just keeps blathering on. Just not quite ready to put down ‘the mighty pen.’ There are serious considerations here-namely my 2 loyal readers. Can’t just leave them in the lurch now can I? Don’t answer. Please. Don’t.

There’s a word my Dad favored when he felt I was being inappropriate about the sacredness of God and religion. The word is ‘spuut.’ Hard to explain how it’s pronounced. I’m not sure of it’s spelling either. (Obviously you’re not here for a learning experience of odd Dutch slang words because I’m clueless). It’s not ‘spot,’ but rather close to the first syllable in ‘sputter,’ but with a titch more ‘o.’ But if I write it out like spout, that’s not right either. So I decided to add double ‘u’s because almost every word in the Dutch language has double letters in it at least once somewhere so it looks legit to me.

My friend Angie (a devout Christian-full of faith and hope) posted these memes on Facebook a few days ago. I felt a little guilty laughing, then laughed harder after reading the captions. The harder I laughed the more guilt I felt, which told me I probably shouldn’t have been laughing in the first place. But I laughed, giggled, gasped until I couldn’t breathe. Not as much when I pictured my Dad’s stern look decades ago. Shaking his head at how disrespectful I was.

Gonna ask for some forgiveness here.

Dear Heavenly Father,

I am grateful for your patience Lord. I am a sinner and still You love me. Please continue to watch over and bless this great nation. Fill my heart with kindness and forgiveness. I ask You to bless those who are sick, hurting and mentally weary. In Jesus name, amen…

P.S. Lord, 2020 has been challenging and a bit of a downer. Might I make 2 small, insignificant requests which have nothing to do with our (elephant in the room) 2 bothersome P’s, namely politics and pandemics, but would result in minor happiness for our mundane lives, at least momentarily?

1. Could you might make the tiniest change from the season finale of The Good Doctor. Every woman on the planet sincerely hopes Dr. Neil Melendez is still alive. Maybe make it a dream sequence (just trying to help).

2. Please, please don’t let anything bad happen in the Rip/Beth storyline on Yellowstone this year. Especially Rip. There’s only 2 more episodes, not that big of a task. Remember, my main concern is Rip. Humbly yours, Neese

I really don’t mean to belittle God or make light of the gospel. I have been blessed in my life far more than I deserve. Not trying to offend anyone, just trying to add a little humor to my life because there hasn’t been much in it lately.

PP.SS. Last ‘ask’ I swear (not literally). Been a fan of Will Yun Lee since Witchblade. If you could keep his character, Dr. Alex Park safe and give him a bigger storyline I’d be grateful. Too much? Sorry God…