Ticked or Tickled…

A couple of days ago, I mentioned to John that I was working on story # 60 for my blog. Shaking his head in total amazement and wonder he inquired, “what on earth can you still find to write about?” Ugh. Thanks Hon. While number 50 wasn’t a big deal to me, I feel differently about number 60. Huh. So all 4 of you lucky readers get a sneak peek into what makes me tick-and what ticks me off. In no particular order and without further ado:

 

Two favorites. Potato salad in a Blue Delft bowl…

1. Many of my favorite foods start with the letter P: PRETZELS (soft chewy bread ones), POPCORN with real butter. PIE CRUSTS. Leftover crusts topped with cinnamon and sugar, or those that are tucked underneath fruit and cream fillings. PEPSI (diet) and all things POTATO. Mashed, fried, baked, scalloped, French fries and my number one, Potato Salad.

2. I detest winter. Pretty much any day under 32 degrees.

3. I come from a long line of squinty-eyed females. If there’s snow on the ground or the sun is shining, I’m wearing shades with my left eye partially closed. My Mom, grandma, and great-grandma were afflicted with this too.

4. I hate snow. Every stinking flake. EVERY. STINKING. FLAKE.

5. I truly believe I’m a better driver than 99% of the drivers on the road. Jeff Gordon and Jimmy Johnson are in the other 1%.

6. I loathe frozen lakes.

7. I love the word “supper” and use it whenever possible. For example: “We’re having home canned beef, gravy, redskins and fresh green beans for supper. Let’s not forget my cranberry sauce. Most suppers (only my plate) include this and are better because of it. Yum.”

 

 

8. I hate slippery roads, sidewalks and parking lots.

9. I love cake and cupcake sugar topping decorations. To get my fix I nervously wait for whatever holiday has just passed, rush to the store, buy however many that are leftover. Usually now at half price. Yeah, I’m a bargain hunter. Pop them off the cardboard, put them in a snak bag. Carefully dole out 3 or 4 a day until gone.

 

Godzilla or Princess. Love these. Yup childish…

 

10. I have this fear (ok it might be irrational) that sometime I’m gonna get the flu right after I’ve eaten one of my 2 favorite meals. Major bummer. But no matter how debilitating this fear has become, it’s NEVER ONCE prohibited me from making, eating and over indulging in either meal. Stay strong Neese! BTW the 2 meals in question (in no particular order) causing all this drool is my own home canned spaghetti sauce with garlic bread, and roast turkey, stuffing, mashed potatoes, gravy and cranberry sauce. Yup, life is better for all concerned when cranberry sauce is served.

11. I dislike wearing coats a lot. Ditto for hats, gloves and scarves. Haven’t owned a pair of boots in years. Not planning on buying any either.

12. I am afraid of clowns (Stephen King’s It) and I have no fear making this claim. Clowns are sinister, evil and creepy. If you love your children, be good parents and keep the terrifying clowns out of their lives.

 

For their good mental health, keep away from kids..

 

13. I hate days when it gets dark by 5 pm. Why God?

14. I keep a stash of a couple hundred assorted cards for every occasion. On second thought I got no card stating, “I’m sorry your rotten neighbor’s dog dug his way under your kennel to knock-up Fi-Fi.”

 

My stash of cards. Only reason I don’t send one is pure laziness…

 

15. I get twitchy if I run out of anything. I have been a “quantity” buyer since I found an extra 20 spot in my wallet decades ago.

16. I hate being deaf. Saying “what” 50 times a day. Trying to read lips. Feeling excluded when I’m really not. Feeling isolated, and I am.

17. I thank God everyday since I started losing my hearing. Thankful that it’s my hearing that took a hike instead of my sight. I’d be learning a whole new set of life skills if it was my sight. Kinda old to learning too many things like reading and cooking minus vision. Thanks again God.

18. I’m infatuated with Michael Kors bags, and own a few. Not nearly enough.

19. I tend to hold grudges for a very long time. As in decades. Big problem.

20. My least favorite household chore is sweeping floors. I know, it’s odd.

21. I have very little respect for any organized religion anymore. Another big problem and very sad.

22. I can be “not nice” at times.

23. I am annoyingly loyal to certain products and brand names. Realized recently that my favorite shampoo, conditioner and hair spray are no longer on the shelves in stores. Scoured the Internet and ordered a dozen of each. Yes folks, in just a few short years, you will see this grandma walking around with very dirty, smelly hair. Better enjoy the fragrant eucalyptus while I’ve still got some inventory. And hair.

 

Part of my recent order. It had better last a long time….

 

24. I’ve been addicted to Mentholatum Natural Ice Lip Balm for 25 years. Not ashamed to say I have 50 unopened tubes in the house. Panic sets in when the total drops below 30.

25. God invented cotton candy so my life would be happy and fulfilled.

26. I’m hopelessly old-fashioned. I love diamonds, sapphires, and rubies. Worse than that. Wait-for-it. I still like and wear YELLOW GOLD. Gasp.

27. I don’t like taking any medication. Ever.

28. I’m amazed every day that I manage to keep any house plants alive.

 

A baby African Violet I started…

 

29. I love laying out in the sun. But not when it’s hot out. Perfect day is bright sun, vivid blue skies, green leaves from the trees against the sky and about 60 degrees. Me, a book on a chaise lounge. Perfect. Ok a glass of water.

30. I still prefer (literally) holding and reading books and newspapers.

 

Books that I’ve read and loved. My favorite way to read…

 

31. My arms are always cold. Even when it’s 90 degrees out.

32. I loved smoking. Tareyton is better, charcoal is why. I quit 25 years ago.

33. I love eating more. Haven’t quit yet. No plans in the future to do so either.

34. When real, fresh tomatoes are available, I eat at least one a day. Like an apple using salt, or sliced on bread topped with sugar. Often the whole month of August I’ll eat a BLT everyday. And no mayo.

35. Same goes for fresh rhubarb. Peel, sprinkle with salt and eat daily during spring and early summer. When the stalks are small and tender. More drool.

36. I hate gambling. The noise from all those clanking coins and machines nearly drive me insane. I have no problem buying, and wearing an expensive top ONCE. Then decide it doesn’t look good on me. Donate it and never give it another thought. But I am almost incapable of sliding a quarter into a slot machine. Best thing about my trips to Las Vegas were the mountain goats at Hoover Dam. Butting horns. Echoing off the mountain.

37. Old hymns and the lyrics from You Are My Sunshine make me cry. Every time. So do some commercials, especially freaking Hallmark.

38. I’ve loved driving since I was 12.

39. While I hope not many (Oops, I meant any) fall through, I really dislike ice fisherman. And the second city that pops up in my backyard during our long, miserable, frozen winters.

40. What good ever comes from getting into a cold car? Maybe escaping some 50 mph winds from a blizzard. Pretty lame reason. No good comes from cold cars. I hate cold cars. Huh. I hate cold.

41. I don’t tease children. I think it’s mean. Don’t like it when anyone else teases them either. That doesn’t make the kid a better person. It’s mean.

42. On the other hand, I love teasing my son-in-law Tracey. He can dish it out as well as take it. I only tease people I like. In person or on Facebook. He’s 6′ 4″ and has yet to smack me in 17 years. But he’d probably like to sometimes.

43. I don’t like scary movies. If I hear a door creak during a commercial, I flip the channel to ease my thudding heart.

44. I do like psychological thrillers and action adventure movies.

45. My favorite genre in books are cop/lawyers chasing/defending serial killers. Guess I can read scary better than I can watch it. I’m not very brave, adventuresome or daring, ever.

46. I know it’s nearly impossible to fathom, but at times during my life, my sarcasm and sometimes razor sharp wit with has been a hinderance. Go figure.

47. I don’t miss periods. Or commas.

48. You are now an expert in all things Duh-Neese…

 

One thought on “Ticked or Tickled…

  1. 2- Agree. 4- Snow days off from school are nice esp. when the sun come out two hours after the announcement. 7- That pic. will look delicious no matter how many times you use it. 8- Especially for old timers. 11- Yes. 13- Depressing, yes. 19- Me, too. 30- Me, too. 33- I do too…but I'm on a mandatory diet, now.34- Eat them everyday. 40- No good is right. 41- It's VERY mean!

    Like

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